that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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