Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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