i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize