trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize