Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i think i have herpe
just one?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize