I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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