after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
So apparently I’m into choking now
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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