ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize