I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize