How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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