he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
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