If that was your dad, he is hot
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
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I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
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If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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