im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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