I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize