i can't believe i had my finger in that
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
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The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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