I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Randomize