did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize