I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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