I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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