wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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