I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize