so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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