i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize