he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
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