My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize