I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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