How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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