forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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