I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
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Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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