Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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