ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize