i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
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Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
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You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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