Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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