Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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