Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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