ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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