it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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