She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize