never play flip cup with pint glasses
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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