Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
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just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
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Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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