That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize