I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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