what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize