maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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