And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize