i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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