At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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