whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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