his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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