I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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